I Am Returning

I have spent the last two weeks just having a lot of fun. I haven’t been blogging at all because I’ve been wanting to soak up all that January was for me. I’ve been happy. Happier then I have been a long time.

I’ve gone out with friends and played games into the night. I’ve laughed more then I have in what feels like forever. I’m experiencing so much more from life and it feels like everything is changing in my life for the better. So for a while I wanted to put aside responsibility that was outside my work and just have fun.

Blogging is wonderful and you all mean the world to me. It has been a saving grace from when I was suffering. I am not suffering anymore. I’m happy and I feel free. I’ve been milking that feeling for all it’s worth.

I am coming back to blogging because it is something I’m passionate about. Sharing all that I love and all that I care about. Nerding out about my favorite tv shows and movies, and getting excited about new books. Sometimes a good break filled with good things is what you need to remind you of why you love doing what you do in the first place.

I love writing. I love being myself and knowing that the right readers will come to find and enjoy what I wrote. I love blogging and sharing my thoughts and feelings about things and having conversations with fellow bloggers and book lovers about the fandoms we love.

It saved me from getting too far deep into depression at one point. Helped me to let go of pain. Helped me to see the kind of person I am and who I am becoming. I appreciate this community like I do no other.

I’m happy to be coming back. I feel fantastic about coming back in such a positive way. My January was amazing. I know this year is going to be one of the best I’ve ever had.

So I’m ready. I’m ready to see what amazing things I can create and do in the rest of 2020. I know it’s going to be a blast.

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! 

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Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

Growing Into A New Mentality

I think that after a year of much spiritual and mental growth it’s time for a new era. An era of happy. I’m ready to be happy. To do me and live my life as free as I can.

This year has started off better then I could’ve imagined. I have so much to be joyful about and so much I just want to enjoy. Knowing I have all the time in the world to enjoy it is wonderful.

I’ve let go of so much. I’m learning to create a new story. I’m learning to give up old patterns and I’ve seen today that I’m still on the way to it. Which is ok. I’m fine with being on my way to everything that I desire. I know that’s how it will be all my life. I’m enjoying now immensely and that’s all that really matters.

I’m still growing into this mentality. Still learning to not push back so much. Learning to be me irregardless of who others are. I’m getting better and better at it everyday. I’m learning that holding on to anything negative at all solves no problems and that letting them go and creating positivity leads to more and more positivity.

I know that growing into this mentality will have some push back from others. Mostly because I’m coming to believe that everything will really be ok. “Reality” as many will want to point out can be sucky, but I wanna focus on the good parts. I know that I’ve done so much of focusing on the negative for way too long.

These past few days in general have been particularly wonderful. I want to focus on that. I want to focus on good times with friends. Wonderful conversations. Knowing that we’re all growing together. I’ve felt really peaceful these past few days. Really calm. Full of knowing. I feel so much clarity.

That’s all of what 2020 will be for me. Happy, full of love, hope for the future, and lots of good times. I can’t believe how good the year has started. I can’t wait to see all the rest that’s in store.

I know things are getting better and better. I’m going to enjoy this life of mine. It’s going to be beautiful.

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! 

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Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

January 2020 Goals

I have very few goals for this month and all are pretty straightforward, but the biggest and the main one is to have as much fun as possible. Whatever I’m doing, I’m just going to have fun. I’ve learned how to do this at work and everywhere I go and my happiness has improved so much because of it.

My other goals are

1. To save at least $20 towards buying a fold out piano because I want to learn to play piano

2. To write 10,000 words towards a writing project.

3. To learn some sort of dance choreography/ tutting

That’s it. Everything else is just to have fun. I don’t know what it’s going to look like. I don’t really mind what form it takes. I just want to start off my 2020 having fun.

I’m so excited for the new year! It’s going to be fantastic. I’m smiling now as I write this. I have this feeling in my bones that this year is going to be just wonderful. I can’t wait!

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! This post is a day late. I got a little sidetracked yesterday, but I hope you all enjoyed it anyway! 

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Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

Check out the Wolfe Creek Candle website and Instagram!

I Welcome 2020!

I am so excited for the new year! I can’t really describe it. I’m so joyful in where I’m at that I’m just happy and excited knowing that the best that the world has to offer will come in the new year. I felt that way at work yesterday. I was suddenly this blissful happy person and I was excited. It felt like I’d taken a pill or something, but I hadn’t. I just felt really good.

I know 2020 is going to be an incredible year, because I feel so good right now. That and that it will be my dominate wish for the new year and every year after to find and experience as much joy as possible in each and every moment.

There is no real goal that I have set for 2020. I don’t really care for resolutions. Especially because they always seem to drop off pretty quickly. Plus, what you want for yourself is continually changing as you grow and change. So I don’t like to have a set thing that must happen in the new year.

However, I do want to set some sort of arbitrary goal each month. To learn something new or to do something fun that I hadn’t yet tried. Also, to write. To set some obtainable writing goals and to have fun writing.

With writing sometimes I feel I get weird about it, because I expect too much of myself when it comes to writing. Yet, when I take some time to sit down and write the words flow. It’s always there and easy to tap into. It’s breaking through that initial wall that I’ve got to work on. So I’ll probably make some sort of goal around that.

Either way, I’ll be making a January goals post tomorrow that will be a little more detailed as far as what I want to do in that month. I’m just so excited! So excited to live life. To follow my joy. Ever since I first decided to do so it’s gotten easier and easier and it feels incredible!

I wish everyone the best possible year ahead you can have. I wish you all the greatest happiness you can muster in the new year. I wish everyone to feel as good as possible in the new year.

In this moment I feel such joy, love, and warmth in my heart. I’m so excited to dance, play, and have fun in the new year. It’s going to be the best yet!

Welcome to 2020! Cheers to a year to remember! A year of transformation. A year where we live the life we’ve always wanted to live!

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! 

Check out my Instagram and Twitter

Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

Check out the Wolfe Creek Candle website and Instagram!

My Thoughts on 2019

Words cannot express how happy I am with where I am in life right now. 2019 started off absolutely terribly. I was not in a good mental health state. I hope was hurting deeply and all I wanted was happiness for myself and everyone involved in the situation that occurred then.

However, because that occurred and because I got so upset with the fact that all I wanted was to feel joy and that I wanted to feel that alongside the people that I love and that I wasn’t living that at the time it allowed me to choose differently for myself. It allowed me to see myself for who I really am. Someone who loves so incredibly deeply and with every inch of her soul. Something that meant that I knew what it was to love unconditionally and that I needed to turn that love inward so that I could live that in my everyday life.

This year was defined by that decision. It took so many inward conversations. So much patience for myself. So much self-soothing and self-care. Then, day after day one improvement became several and it grew and grew to where I no longer felt depression or anxiety period. I gently soothed my depression and anxiety out of existence.

Needless to say I am so proud of myself. So proud of this reality I am now living. One where I have made my joy and my relationship with myself to be the number one most important thing in my life. That by doing so I have created in myself a joyous person all the time. So much so that it is noticeable by those around me.

Doing this allows me to be the wholeness that I am with all who I am with. It lets everyone off the hook of having to be a certain way or do a certain thing in order for me to be happy. I just am. It is the gift I will give to every friend I have. Every coworker and every family member. It will be the gift I give to my significant other in the future. The gift of me taking responsibility for creating my own joy and following it and not making anyone be my excuse to not be happy.

One of my deepest wishes for all human beings is for everyone to experience the fullness of joy that they possibly can for themselves. It is why I have started walking this path of my own joy. Because it would be the greatest gift I could give to myself and everyone in my life would benefit from it.

It is something that is never done, because there is always more and more fun to be had and more and more fun ready to be realized, but to have realized this by the end of the year and to have changed so deeply from it is incredible to me.

I can’t say how much I’ve experienced more fun and more good things just from appreciating every moment of fun and everything that brings me joy in the moment they are there. 2019 has been the set up for what I know will be the best year of my life in 2020. I have no idea what it will look like or what will be in store, but I know that my life is going to continue to change and I can’t wait to embrace it!

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below!

Check out my Instagram and Twitter

Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

Check out the Wolfe Creek Candle website and Instagram!

Books of Christmas Past

Last year, I did not receive any books for Christmas. Typically this boat talks about just that, but last year was a tough Christmas for me, but all that happened then has turned into a blessing for me.

See I was in no position to even really feel enjoyment with books or much of anything in general. The contrast to how I feel now in this moment is incredible. I have changed so much this year and I achieved the ultimate goal that I’ve had for the entirety of my life. Which is to no longer have depression or anxiety way on me. Especially the last three months, I’ve felt free of any sort of Depression or Anxiety.

I’m at a point where I’m happy all the time. I find enjoyment everywhere and life is wonderful all the time for me. After my birthday, I set out to write the best things that happened each day and I was so surprised and delighted to find these past 8 days have been absolutely incredible! I look back on this week and I think that I’d want to fill my life with as many wonderful and unique moments every single day into the future. It’s been incredible.

Mainly, what has changed is my beliefs about life. Which sounds bigger then it really is. I’ve just discovered that I can and should be responsible for my own happiness and that I’m good at it. I’m good at keeping myself happy. I’m good at finding things to think about that bring me joy. I’m good at allowing myself the things that create greater joy in my life. It’s an incredible thing.

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas Eve! Merry Christmas everyone!

Check out my Instagram and Twitter

Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

Check out the Wolfe Creek Candle website and Instagram!

Today Was My Birthday! 🎈

Today I turned 21! Why I feel weird about it I’m not exactly sure. Maybe, I just being technically considered an official adult when I have the humor and sarcasm of a 14 year old boy. Or the fact that being 21 means I can buy alcohol and I could care less about that.

I don’t know. On one hand I’m in the amazing place in my life. I can feel so deeply that I’m about to start seeing some amazing things happen in my life and yet another part of me just wants to be a kid. Not that being an adult means that you have to discard all childish things. I’m never going to give up the lightness of joy I feel when I connect to the childish things of life.

Maybe it’s just my impression of being 21 and what being an adult means. In reality, I can make it whatever I want. Which is what I am going to do. So I’m going to forget about all the things about being 21 I don’t really care about and define it for myself.

As a 21 year old I’m going to have the most fun I’ve ever had in my life.

This last year being 20 I spent a majority well, all of that time cleaning up my mental health. I literally don’t have depression or anxiety anymore. It’s unreal. So, I’m proud as heck of 20 year old me. I got myself through the darkest most scared parts of my mind and gently coaxed it into being happy pretty much all of the time. Which is honestly, the best present I’ve ever given myself ever. I didn’t kick depressions ass. I soothed depressions heart. I soothed it out of existence and that’s the most incredible thing I’ve ever done ever.

So that means 21 year old me gets to enjoy herself. She gets to live out one of the happiest years of life so far (I intend to continue the increased happy years). She gets to enjoy waking up being excited about the day. She gets to know that everything is always working out for her. She gets to feel good about herself. She gets to experiment with makeup and expressing herself because she finds it fun. She gets to have so much fun.

I am so excited for this next year in my life. I have evolved so much and I feel so much trust in myself and in the universe and I have this feeling, this inner knowing, that this next year is going to be filled with so much more to be joyous about then I can imagine! Every moment I am embodying more and more to be the woman that I desire to be. So whatever happens this year I’m ready.

I had fun today. I may have had to work, but I had a wonderful breakfast and an awesome vanilla latte and my mom actually surprised me with a gift of nail polish and an eyeshadow as I’ve been interested in playing with makeup recently and I always wear nail polish. I know I’m probably not going to wear it everyday. I just want to have fun with it and I feel that’s worth exploring.

Thank you all for reading! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below!

Check out my Instagram and Twitter

Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

Check out the Wolfe Creek Candle website and Instagram!

A Gift Guide for the Late Bookmas Shopper

I have been pretty good about shopping for gifts for everyone I love this Christmas season. Mostly, because I haven’t shopped last minute. However, things happen. Sometimes, your just busy and you haven’t gone out to shop. Some of us are motivated by the last minute madness. So, if your having a hard time figuring out what the heck your going to buy your friend when Christmas is only a week and a half away!

  1. Buy them a book: I mean this one should be obvious. Books are great! Know a friend that likes Karate? buy them a book about it. If they like cooking, there are tons of fantastic cook books. Also, whatever genre of movies they like there are tons of great fiction to pick from and even if they don’t like to read, you can give them the gift of opportunity and who knows? Maybe you’ll save a life.
  2. A Nice Mug: Mugs are versatile and necessary. There is a mug for every life situation. There are beautiful mugs. There are meme mugs. There are mugs for every hobby out there. Never underestimate the power of a good mug.
  3. Some nice treats: Have a foodie in your life? Get them some good snacks. I have a friend that straight up told me they are getting me treats for Christmas and I’m 100% happy with that. I love a good snack. Many of your friends probably feel the same way.
  4. A Quick Charging Charger: This is a gift idea I found from Molly Burke’s list on YouTube that I really love. It’s something that most don’t typically buy for themselves, but its something they would use all the time and that will 100% be appreciated.
  5. Some nice socks.I don’t know about everyone else, but socks disappear all the time on me. My dog destroys them, the washing machine eats them up, the universe steals one half of a pair into the black hole of pair-less socks. I would be so grateful to receive a nice pack of socks for Christmas.
  6. Coffee/Tea: Most of the world runs on these two staples. I am personally in love with both of these drinks. I got a thing of tea from my boss one year and I still enjoy a cup of that type of tea now. It can last a long time and it’s just nice to have.
  7. Also, A BOOK: Just because I have some other great ideas on this list doesn’t mean this one isn’t the most important. I don’t see enough book giving to just random people for Christmas and honestly that’s sad. There are millions of great books in the world. Play matchmaker with a book to a friend or loved one. Have them talk about the book with you after. Increase your level of friendship. It’s the best gift ever!
  8. A Curated playlist on a DVD: I really wanted to do this for a loved one, one year and I never got the chance to do it, but its a really cool gift. Put together songs that remind you of them. Songs you know they love. Songs you love they haven’t heard. Whatever feels right. There is effort in this that shows how much you care and I think its one of the most adorable gifts ever and if you pair it with a book…then it is perfect!
  9. An Experience: Another gift idea from Molly’s list. Pay for an experience for you and your friend or loved one to do together. Maybe its something neither of you have done before or something they have mentioned wanting to do like a workout class or a painting lesson or going to customize their own sneakers or something like that. Another good one is a VR experience or to go and enjoy a laser tag hang out thing. The possibilities are endless!
  10. Something they have specifically asked for. Sometimes, to me this feels like cheating. I tend not to like doing this, but you’ll know they love what they get when its something that they have been wanting for a while.

Thank you all for reading! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas season and that you all receive all that you hope for.

Check out my Instagram and Twitter

Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

Check out the Wolfe Creek Candle website and Instagram!

What Christmas Means to Me

Christmas is one of my favorite holidays. It’s magic and joyous and kind. It’s as much the gifts you get as the gifts you give, yet as I’ve gotten old enough to go out and buy my own gifts for people, it’s the look on someone’s face when I give them something they really love that puts the biggest smile on my face.

Everyone on this earth wants to feel joy and happiness and to feel cared for. Christmas is the time where I really feel and see that all around me.

Then there is the romantic parts of it. Mistletoe and ice skating dates, drinking egg nog or a peppermint mocha with someone your getting to know, feeling that romantic pull in your heart. It’s a beautiful thing and it makes me feel excited, because I’ve never experienced that in person before and love during the holidays feels like it’s sprinkled with that little extra spice of magic.

People change during this time of year. There is more kindness. More remembering that we really are all in this life together and we are all deserving of being treated well. A lot of people donate time to feeding the homeless and more people give a little extra to those in need. More people are willing to give the benefit of the doubt and understand that mistakes are human.

This time of year is special. The decorations all around are gorgeous. There is a festive spirit you can feel in the energy of the people around you. I’ve seen so many guys wearing Christmas sweaters this year… so so many. More then the girls and I thought to myself, “the men really came through in terms of spirit this year and I want to hug every single one wearing one of those sweaters because I’m so proud. All of the women too while I’m at it. The Christmas cheer ends nowhere in my heart.”

But, what I’m most happy to say here is that this has been my favorite Christmas so far. It’s been happier then any other Christmas I’ve had and it’s because I’m happier now then I’ve ever been. Every single day of my life recently has been so joyful and full of life that it baffles me. I’m treating myself the way I always deserved to be treated. I follow my joy at all times. I follow my excitement at all times. Everything is working out for me. I’ve never appreciated myself or life in general more.

This Christmas feels so rich. Rich in happy moments with my family. Rich in dancing. Rich in singing until I got my annual sinus issues and even that hasn’t been bad at all. I’ve never had such a good time while my nose and throat were acting up in my entire life. I’m so deliriously and wonderfully happy and I know there is no end to it in sight. I know that my life is just going to get better and better. There is so much good to experience. So much music to fall in love with. So many books to read and movies to watch. So much to laugh about. I feel so blessed this Christmas and I know it’s a feeling I will have for the rest of my life.

Christmas is like all the best parts of life to me. I can only explain it as these visions of beautiful moments in my head. Moments like when I gave the item in my hand to a woman who was looking to buy that item and didn’t know where to find it. Then I just went back and got another one to buy myself. Moments like one of the guys that work as a janitor taking out the trash from my store so I didn’t have to do it myself. Then another time me holding the door open for the same guy when I was on my way to storage (which he didn’t want to accept at first.. which made my eyes roll, but I digress). Moments like my sister tickling me when I was trying to get her to fist bump my hand and us both ending up laughing tell we started coughing because it was all too much. Moments like picking out a free ornament from World Market with my family and finding the most beautiful animal ornaments to hang on the tree.

Christmas is a beautiful time of year. Filled with the taste of peppermint and lots of music and cheer. I love it with every fiber of my being and I appreciate so much Christmas this and every year.

Thank you all for reading! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below!

Check out my Instagram and Twitter

Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

Check out the Wolfe Creek Candle website and Instagram!

Till next time!

My Christmas Playlist!

I love music and dancing. I love listening to good music almost more then anything else. I listen to so much music and so much variety of music that most turn up a brow when they know I’m that small percentage of people who max out the Spotify limit and makes a ginormous playlist instead of liking songs, because it doesn’t let me like them anymore because I’ve liked way too many.

This year I shared with all of you my Halloween playlist and since then that playlist has grown as my playlists always do, but that just means I have new music to share for next year!

However, this post is about my Christmas playlist! I have some classics, some new songs, but all the joyful songs of the season! I made sure that my Christmas playlist was as positive as possible. Music that makes me feel alive. Music that makes me dance and sing and feel joy. I love that having played this at my work that my coworkers and I have had some good laughs dancing along to the music and that it’s been such a good time.

This Christmas is going to be one of my favorites. I can feel that deep in my heart. It’s started off with a bang and I’m excited for all that the season will bring.

On to the music!!

Thank you all for reading! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below!

Check out my Instagram and Twitter

Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter!

Till next time!

Check out the Wolfe Creek Candle website and Instagram!