Today Was My Birthday! 🎈

Today I turned 21! Why I feel weird about it I’m not exactly sure. Maybe, I just being technically considered an official adult when I have the humor and sarcasm of a 14 year old boy. Or the fact that being 21 means I can buy alcohol and I could care less about that.

I don’t know. On one hand I’m in the amazing place in my life. I can feel so deeply that I’m about to start seeing some amazing things happen in my life and yet another part of me just wants to be a kid. Not that being an adult means that you have to discard all childish things. I’m never going to give up the lightness of joy I feel when I connect to the childish things of life.

Maybe it’s just my impression of being 21 and what being an adult means. In reality, I can make it whatever I want. Which is what I am going to do. So I’m going to forget about all the things about being 21 I don’t really care about and define it for myself.

As a 21 year old I’m going to have the most fun I’ve ever had in my life.

This last year being 20 I spent a majority well, all of that time cleaning up my mental health. I literally don’t have depression or anxiety anymore. It’s unreal. So, I’m proud as heck of 20 year old me. I got myself through the darkest most scared parts of my mind and gently coaxed it into being happy pretty much all of the time. Which is honestly, the best present I’ve ever given myself ever. I didn’t kick depressions ass. I soothed depressions heart. I soothed it out of existence and that’s the most incredible thing I’ve ever done ever.

So that means 21 year old me gets to enjoy herself. She gets to live out one of the happiest years of life so far (I intend to continue the increased happy years). She gets to enjoy waking up being excited about the day. She gets to know that everything is always working out for her. She gets to feel good about herself. She gets to experiment with makeup and expressing herself because she finds it fun. She gets to have so much fun.

I am so excited for this next year in my life. I have evolved so much and I feel so much trust in myself and in the universe and I have this feeling, this inner knowing, that this next year is going to be filled with so much more to be joyous about then I can imagine! Every moment I am embodying more and more to be the woman that I desire to be. So whatever happens this year I’m ready.

I had fun today. I may have had to work, but I had a wonderful breakfast and an awesome vanilla latte and my mom actually surprised me with a gift of nail polish and an eyeshadow as I’ve been interested in playing with makeup recently and I always wear nail polish. I know I’m probably not going to wear it everyday. I just want to have fun with it and I feel that’s worth exploring.

Thank you all for reading! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below!

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My Sister’s Birthday

My sister’s birthday was on July 9th. The reason I didn’t get this post up sooner was well.. because I needed time to recover from the actual celebrating part.

My sister, her friend Tony, her friends nephew Andrew, and I, all went to six flags on Tuesday and it was fun. We went on almost all the rides because the wait times were pretty good and we all had a good time. It was a little awkward for me at first being around people I hadn’t really met, but it didn’t take too long for me to relax and just enjoy it for what it was.

It was really wonderful to see my sister relaxed and enjoying herself. She was quiet, but that’s who she is as a person and it was nice to see her look so content. We ate some good food. We had some nachos for a snack and some crazy awesome funnel cake for a birthday dessert. We made a whole day of it and its a memory I know I’m going to treasure.

I needed time to recover, because we walked a lot and apparently, g-forces will cause your body to be sore after a while.

Anyway, I love my sister. I wish her all the happiness in the world. She deserves the best. She’s lived a lot longer then I have and I am proud to know her. This may be late, but Happy Birthday Misty! I’m so happy that God brought me into your life. I’ve learned a lot from you. I look up to you and I hope you know how proud I am to be your sister.

Thanks for reading! <— it feels weird saying that in a post like this one, but I am always grateful. I hope everyone reading this has a wonderful day!

-Till next time!

My 20th Birthday

Today, December 17th, is my birthday. For many people a birthday is something special and something celebratory. For me most of the time it feels like just another day of life. Yeah, I get well wishes and congratulations, but honestly if I didn’t mention my birthday was coming up to anyone no one would be the wiser.

That’s something I’ve come to terms with over the years. Having a December birthday can be weird because everyone’s scrambling for gifts for their loved ones for Christmas and frankly I understand that that’s what is and should be more important to people. A lot of the time too gifts for a December birthday and Christmas are rolled into one and you learn that that’s just what it is.

The point that I’m trying to make is, I’ve learned that the day of my birth isn’t all that special, but I can use it as a way to gather what I’ve accomplished in that year of life and what I want to do in the future.

So this year in my life I want to try and accomplish goals I’ve wanted to achieve for years. Like writing everyday and exercising when I can. But I also want to make it a point to be happier. To do as many things as I can that make me happy. To ask when I want something. To not feel so guilty about wanting things for myself.

I also want to tell my future self that no matter what happens this year to be more mindful and chill out a bit before making any decisions. To take life a little more calmly. But at the same time to not hold back and take chances.

There is no reason that the 20th year of my life can’t be one of the best years of my life. I just got to have faith and do what feels right.

Thanks for reading! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below.

-Till next time!

An Open Letter to my Future Self: Birthday Post

Dear Tiana, 

Today was December 17, 2016 and you had just turned 18 years old. You know how long you had waited for this day. At this moment, I don’t even know what to think. 

By now 10 years have passed and I hope they have been wonderful. You better have  been keeping up with your writing! I definitely hope you got into a writing routine and have finished several books by now. You, at this moment, are 28 years old. What are you doing right now? I wonder what people you have met. Are you published? You better be published. I know it’s hard, I’ve already tried, but you better not be throwing excuses at me. 

Also, I hope you know I love you. Which I guess is a slight bit pretentious because your technically me, but if you need some extra love I got your back! 

Future me. I figure the past 10 years have been pretty crazy. I figure you’ve had pleanty of rough patches and many wonderful times, but I hope you stay true to yourself. I hope that your still with family. That you didn’t argue as much as you know I have. Family is never perfect. We both know this very well, so, spread some love. 

Are you still blogging? Daily blogging? You better be. You most definitely better be reading. My God, if your not reading I will take over your body and smack you. If you are still reading… then that’s a crisis averted. You still have some sense in you. 

Please tell me that you choose not to be lazy and actually do some exercises. I swear, I know I haven’t been good at it, but I know that needs to change and I hope you are the changed, healithier version of the me today. 

Also, did you ever start a book tube account? I would be really proud of you if you did, but if you didn’t that’s ok. As long as your still blogging. I’m really harping you about that. It’s just, you know how much it meant for me to start writing a blog. You know how much I wanted to do some good with it. If anything, I hope that’s still the Number one most important thing to you, to do some good to combat the bad. 

Future me, I hope you remembered to read this. I hope that this is something that makes you smile. I have so much hope for you. Please continue following our dreams. Remember as I’ve meantioned before, do some good, make people happy, don’t argue, don’t get mad, getting mad is useless because it accomplishes only more anger, happiness is living in the moment and doing and being good, spread the love, and be you! You have the potential to be better than you could ever imagine. I feel that at the bottom of our soul. 

With much self-love and healing, 

Tiana Wolfe

P.S. Happy Birthday!!!!!! Love you!! 🎉🤗

If you are me and your reading this, I am proud of you. If you are another reader, thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed! What message do you have for your future self?

-Till next time!