September Goals

September is a month I’m really focusing on setting achievable goals for each day and commuting to them. Some things I want to try to do daily and other things will be just for that day. I wanted to start on a lot of the daily things I wanted to incorporate today, but ultimately that didn’t happen. Instead, me and my family went out to do some important errands and did a little shopping and then went to get the car cleaned and so by the end I deemed that today not the time to jump into a bunch of stuff that I simply wouldn’t be able to finish in my state.

So my one thing for today is looking for a better hair care routine and it’s been more difficult to try and find something good for me then I thought and there’s so much information that I’m lost. I have dandruff issues and coarse straight hair. Finding something that would help out my scalp health and also help the health of my hair and smooth it out and make it shiny is a task.

This month I also know of two books I want to finish and review and I’m almost done with both so that’s a blessing.

The first of which is ‘So You Want To Talk About Race’ by Ijeoma Oluo!

I want to continue educating myself on issues of race and how I can help with dismantling issues of racism starting with a look at myself, my privilege as a white woman, and my biases. Reading this book so far has helped me understand a few situations that I didn’t quite grasp before and re-introduced me to concepts I had looked into in the past. I’m excited to finish it! It’s been a great read so far.

The second book is an advanced readers copy that I’m very much behind on called ‘The Lost City’ by Amanda Hocking.

I’m exactly the same amount through with it as I am in ‘So You Want To Talk About Race’ at 61% percent through. This book so far has been interesting, but definitely not nearly on the same level as ‘So You Want To Talk About Race’, but they are so different in topic and everything else they are pretty incomparable. I do think this book is cute. But, I am kind of sad that there really hasn’t been much movement in it yet. A bunch of searching for her history and figuring out who exactly this friend is that the kid she’s taking care of brought to their apartment with her.

I do want to do some drawing this month. Also some language learning and math learning as well. I’m a bit of a nerd so I like to go on Khan Academy and see how many lessons I can do in 30 minutes. It keeps my mind going and feeds the part of me that misses school.

I want to post daily on the blog as much as I can. It’s nice to share my thoughts like this again. I’ve missed it.

I AM going to be writing as much as I can towards my first draft this month. I was going to write today, but by now it’s a little late for that. So, hopefully tomorrow.

I am also going to be starting a daily exercise routine. Mixing days doing this really cool and fun 30 day challenge of doing shuffle dances and redoing a basic yoga routine. I’d stoped exercising for a while cause I needed to protect my arm cause I got the birth control implant! Which I’m really happy about and let me know if you have any questions about that or if your interested in me doing a post about my experiences being on it so far. I’d love to share!

So yee! This month I have a ton of stuff planned. Lots of different things I’m going to do in so many different areas. I’m happy about all of them and I can’t wait to share how things went at the end of the month!

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! 

Places to donate to Trans communities:

Trans Equality 

The Trevor Project

Transgender Law Center 

Some BLM resources: 

Link to bail funds to donate to!

Link to petitions to sign! 

Link to a video to watch if you can’t donate!

My friend started Live Streaming so check them out HERE!!

Check out my Instagram and Twitter

Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

Check out the Sisters of Twilight website.

If you love my content and wish to offer me extra support by me a Kofi on my donation page!

Coming Back to Blogging

I have written this post more times then I could count in the past. When my life changes I continually feel the need to step inward and quietly come to understand and grow on my own. Yet, I always have found great value in being open online. Sharing my experiences and thoughts on stories, films, current issues, and my life. I’ve missed being on here. So, yes I am returning and this time I imagine I’m here to stay for a good long time.

Someone important in my life told me all I need to do is start and this is me doing just that starting. I have abandoned many things I love in recent times out of a fear. A fear that I’m not good enough. That I don’t deserve to try and be the person I want to be and do the things I want to do. A fear that I’m going to get things wrong. But the truth is I am going to get things wrong at time and I am going to mess up, but my passion for writing. My passion for telling stories that will never leave me.

Life is but a tiny spec of dust in the grand scheme of the universe. I want to make the most use of my tiny spec. There’s life and beauty in even the smallest of creatures in existence. I want to live life as fully as I can. With as much joy as I can.

This is a part of that joy. Discussing books. Promoting authors. Talking about writing and the journey of it. It’s a wonderful thing. So here I am again. Just me, my phone, and many many thoughts. I’m back and it feels so good to be.

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! 

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Places to donate to Trans communities:

Trans Equality 

The Trevor Project

Transgender Law Center 

Some BLM resources: 

Link to bail funds to donate to!

Link to petitions to sign! 

Link to a video to watch if you can’t donate!

Check out my Instagram and Twitter

Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

Check out the Sisters of Twilight website.

If you love my content and wish to offer me extra support by me a Kofi on my donation page!

The Ebony and Fire Writing Club: What Projects are you Working on?

Hello everyone! Welcome back to The Ebony and Fire Writing Club! Phoenix wrote up this amazing post that you all should check out on her writing projects here! For those of you who don’t know me and Phoenix have joined together to bring you a fun writing club to inspire you all on your individual writing journeys!

Also check out our club page here to check out all our posts and notices on what’s to come!

If your interested in joining leave your name below and a little bit about your current project!

I’m so excited because today I’m going to be talking about my project a little bit more and adding a little bit of my favorite advice I take as I move forward in my own writing adventure.

My Current Writing Project

At the moment I’m working on a young adult paranormal romance horror. It’s about two girls who meet and go into the woods and realize that the dangers one of them has known since childhood may not be as false as she once thought. Through it the pair starts to fall for each other and must navigate the sweet feelings they are coming into along with the dangers of a dark evil that’s brewing in the forest.

At the moment I’m in the drafting stage and I have 3,003 words written. I’m doing my best to start a daily system that works and at the moment I’m brewing with inspiration about it!

In the next week I hope to write 500 words a day toward this novel and I will update everyone on June 1st if I’ve succeeded in my goals for the following week!

A Favorite Piece of Writing Advice

For all you aspiring authors out there I got to say this instead of aspiring to be the next Stephan King, Anne Rice, Sarah J. Maas, or J.K. Rowling, aspire to be the first you! All those stories that have become so dear to our hearts started well before any of these authors made a name for themselves. They start in your heart poured out into the page word by word and letter by letter. Write what fills your heart with passion and never stop! The rest will fall into place. Never give up!

What are you working on?

I would love to hear all about the amazing things you all are working on. What are you writing about?

Also if you have any questions about the club or if you are looking for support, advice, or tips feel free to contact me or Pheonix.

Pheonix’s Contact page

My Contact Page

We’ll get back to you as soon as we can!

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! 

Check out my Instagram and Twitter

Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

Check out the Sisters of Twilight website.

If you love my content and wish to offer me extra support by me a Kofi on my donation page!

Announcement! The Ebony and Fire Writing Club!

So two days ago I discussed opening the Raven Writers Accountability club and while working with Phoenix we talked about it and changed things up a bit.

Follow Phoenix’s website here: https://penableme.wordpress.com

Also check out Pheonix’s post for more information: https://penableme.wordpress.com/2020/05/25/new-join-the-ebony-and-fire-writing-club-now/

Each week, I will still be posting about my project, goals, and how I did that week and as a part of the club I encourage everyone whose joining to do the same!

We both are setting up donation pages for special access to advice, tips and tricks, and inspiration. Phoenix has even discussed some special offers that we will be providing over time!

Here is the link to my donation page: https://ko-fi.com/thebookraven

Leave your name down below if your interested in joining!

Phoenix made an awesome trailer for all of you as well!

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! 

Check out my Instagram and Twitter

Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

Check out the Sisters of Twilight website.

If you love my content and wish to offer me extra support by me a Kofi on my donation page!

Thanksgiving Gratitude Post

This year Thanksgiving feels different to me. I used to not care for it so much because I wasn’t always where I wanted to be for the holiday and it would always be awkward and with food I never cared for. This year. This year I realize I am where I want to be.

I’m at a time in my life where I’m excited. Excited about the future. Excited about all the amazing things that have seem to start pouring into my life lately. I’ve been feeling good far more often and my perception on life has changed immensely.

Also, the food this year was great! I enjoyed all of it and that’s the first time I’ve ever felt that. I find that a lot of traditional thanksgiving food is just not for me.

On another note, I feel deeply that I’m on the precipice of something big in my life changing. Something beautiful and happy. It’s been so strong in my mind for the past couple of months and with each passing day I feel it stronger still.

Maybe it’s not even one thing in my life that I feel is on the edge of changing. I once again feel so deeply myself more and more and I’m following my joy. This has lead me to writing again. It’s lead me to trying out makeup for the fun of it. It’s lead me to taking better care of my body and feeling good about what I wear and my body in general. It’s lead me to rest free on days I feel compelled to without judgement. I feel free and knowing that I did that for myself is so mind blowing and wonderful to me.

I know what it’s like to go through a deep depression. I know what thought spiraling yourself into a hole feels like. To have loved myself enough to free myself of that and feel fucking amazing every day is incredible. I’m so proud of the woman I have become. Someone who honors herself. Someone who cares about herself enough to let go of thoughts that bring her sadness and to start focusing on all the good that life has to offer. I did that. I’m not in the trenches fighting a war with my own mind anymore. I’m happy. If that’s not something to be grateful for then I don’t know what is.

Then, there’s the basic things I’m grateful for. Great music to dance to. That video of any animal on my feed. A great book to read. Seeing people happy and laughing with one another. Seeing random acts of kindness. Doing something that brings someone else a moment of joy. Having a place to sleep, eat, and shower at. Having a job. The coffee I’m drinking now at 12:24 am even though it is probably way too late for coffee. Having a tooth brush and toilet paper. Having the phone I’m typing on right now.

I’m in a place in my life of extreme gratitude. 2019 for me has been a year of learning and becoming the kind of woman I always wanted to be. It’s been a year of overcoming and going from barely just existing for a while to truly thriving. But most of all from living in fear to taking that fear and blowing it up in flames and replacing it all with things to be joyous about. Going from worrying about if I even deserve happiness to knowing I deserve the best of all that is. So much so that I am fully responsible for my own joy and happiness regardless of what is happening in my life.

I have transformed this year. If nothing else that’s the best gift I’ve ever given to myself.

Thank you all for reading! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! What are you grateful for?

Check out my Instagram and Twitter

Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

Check out the Wolfe Creek Candle website and Instagram!

Thoughts on Life

It’s 1 am, I played Town of Salem for the first time and loved every second of playing. I am tired, but I am happy. I don’t know what it is about me going on and doing normal stuff that gets me to think so existentially, but I guess that’s just how my brain works.

The saying that life is what you make of it is incredibly true. Whatever you want life to be about you can make it that way. If you want to work really hard and follow a dream you really love you can. If you feel like binging a tv show and relaxing all day you can. No matter what the situation is you have a choice.

I’ve learned that for me, so long as I choose myself and choose my happiness I can’t go wrong. People in the world might care about me, but at the end of the day I have to be my own best friend, therapist, motivational coach, teacher, and on and on. I have to be the one that values myself. Otherwise, how can expect everyone else to value me.

I can choose to let the world cave in (and sometimes it feels like it wants to) or I can push back and choose to do the best I can wherever I’m at in life no matter how low or high that point may be. As I choose myself I also have to value others choosing themselves and understand that they like I am are doing the best they can at the place they are at in life.

It’s a great lesson of radical compassion, for myself and for others. When I make myself accountable in every moment and really see why I have done what I have I can work to be the me I want to be. Now, I realize that I am the me that I want to be.

Putting all passions and hopes for the future aside, who I am now is exactly who I want to be. I care deeply about my family, my friends, animals, anyone I’ve ever loved, even if a stranger is having a rough day. I may have felt with depression and putting myself down, but it’s not something I do anymore.. I lift myself up in every moment. I am an open book. As honest as I ever wanted to be. I am who I am to every person I meet. I am working towards my goals, yet I’m not overextending myself. I am no longer afraid of the future. I am wholly myself.

I let go of some old feelings I didn’t want to admit to myself today and it put me in a yucky mood, yet right after instead of wallowing I decided to watch some videos that lead me to downloading and playing a game that I really enjoy.

Yeah, I’m very critical when I think. Critical of myself and it can lead me astray sometimes, but I’m starting to see the parts of myself I didn’t like before as assets. Even the simple stuff like liking my nose now when I used to really dislike it.

I guess I’m writing this to say this: if you want you can choose the person who you wish to be right now and with small steps you’ll see you can smile in the mirror for tomorrow. That life only has the meaning that you give it. So live the best life that you possibly can with the definition you feel is best for you.

As one lovely human said to me once, “I’m living my best life not my depressed life.” And that’s what I’m choosing to do every single day.

Thank you all for reading! Much love to all of you!

Check out the Wolfe Creek candles website!

-Till next time!

“Starting Over”: Life is What you Create it to Be

This post is going to be a long one, so buckle up! I have a lot to say and I think this will be helpful for a lot of people to hear so here goes nothing.

Currently, in my life I’m not in a bad place. My mental health is pretty good. I feel pretty strong in mind and body and I’ve been deeply working on being positive and doing things that create more happiness in my life.

But, I’m feeling like I’m hitting a wall in my life and I know I need to make some changes and start fresh. One of the main things is my job. I need a different working environment. I enjoy most of my coworkers and I know what needs to be done and how to get it all done well, but it’s a dead end job. I’m not going to grow. I’m not going to get anywhere with it and I need to move on. So, what I’m going to be working on for the next few weeks is getting a new job. Something that brings better income and possible a chance to grow.

Next was something I did today; which was resetting my duolingo progress completely and re-dedicating myself to learning Spanish and making progress in the areas of my life I’ve always wanted to make progress on. It’s mostly a symbolic thing. I want to restart in every aspect and accept for once that I am a beginner in life. I’m only 20. I keep forgetting that I don’t have to be a crazy success just upon starting my life. I’m not at the part where I’m making tons of money and own a house where I live with someone I deeply love and care for yet. That’s ok. Sometimes I want to rush into things and make things the best they can be right away and it sabotages things. It’s ok to be a beginner.

Which is a good introduction into something I’ve had the biggest urge to be open about which is the aftermath of my first relationship. I’ve talked about it before, but I haven’t talked about it in a long time because I wanted to discuss it in a positive way where it doesn’t trigger me to cry about it. Because, I wouldn’t be in this place in my life if I didn’t have that relationship.

Over the months since me and my person last spoke I went through a huge period of inner work that felt like mourning a literal death. It was probably one of the most difficult experiences of my life and it taught me more about myself then any other experience of my life. This person is someone I will always love. I will always have a place in my heart for them. I will always wish them all the happiness in the world. Accepting those facts were actually oddly difficult. Because in my head I convinced myself of a lot of things and one of those things is that I’d probably never hear from this person again and loving someone that needs to cut you out of their life is soul-crushing.

I didn’t understand then why. It went through my head more times then I could count and I wanted answers, but at the same time I didn’t want to force this person to give me closure when he needed silence and space. This of course made my overthinking mind analyze the situation to the max and it became something toxic for me to think about. I couldn’t stop blaming myself. I felt so guilty.

I had never before experienced such a deep and wonderful connection with someone and I felt like I messed it all up. I felt like I hurt him and that his need for no contact was evidence of me being a toxic person in his life. It really really sucked for me to think that way. Especially when all I wanted at the core concerning him was to be a part of his life so I could cheer him on and be a part of his successes and to lift him up when he was down. I felt like I was the one who turned the connection sour because I was in a state of doubt.

Honestly, with what was going on in my life I understand why I felt that way. Accepting that I acted out from my emotions and what I knew best at the time was a big step in the right direction for me, because it helped me no longer beat myself up about the circumstances, because I was trying to honor my families wishes and his at the same time and I put myself in a corner and the anxiety was suffocating.

So I really can’t blame him for distancing himself from me regardless of how he or I felt at the time. Things felt like they were crumbling apart very quickly and he needed out and it took me a long time to fully understand and accept it.

However, I am human and my feeling were and are very real concerning him so it hurt and it hurt a lot. It still hurts. Just the other day I randomly was scrolling on Pinterest and saw an ad for a product from his families business and the tears started to flow. Then, I looked at the website for the first time in months and saw how much they were growing and I felt so much pride it blew me away. I thought after a certain period that maybe the feelings would fade and they haven’t. Not even a little bit. It made me so happy to see that at least his families business is growing and doing well and that at least in that aspect of his life he’s doing well.

Maybe I won’t get to see it happen, but I know I will always be in his corner wishing him well and that all his dreams come true. I know I didn’t handle our relationship in the best way. I know that I depended on him a lot because he brought me a lot of joy when I was struggling with a very difficult situation. I wanted things to work out perfectly and they didn’t and I know I should’ve let things happen naturally instead of worrying so much and that for me was my biggest downfall in the relationship.

Then afterwards I chased for answers and was met with nothing and it’s the only thing that I’m actually ok with. Because, if I didn’t reach out as much as I did I think I would have lost my mind. I needed him to know that I cared. I needed him to know that I was trying my best to be ok with his choice. I also needed him to know that it wasn’t the choice I would have made, but I was trying to accept it. Then when I convinced myself that we really could make it work I wanted to let him know that that door was open. All of that taught me a lot about my own humanness. Especially when I was continuously driven simply by how much I missed him.

When I read “You asked for Perfect” I wanted to share it with him so badly because he would love that book and appreciate it so much more then I did. There are some new songs that I’ve listened too that I know he’d love and would put a smile on his face and instantly I’d want to share them with him. Those times have been the hardest. Because I miss him most deeply as a friend. Yes, the idea of kissing him and being with him romantically is appealing to me, but at the end of the day, I miss him as a friend. He got me like no one else I’ve ever known has. I know that in person we’d be able to talk so smoothly and effortlessly there would be no room for awkwardness. One of his first date suggestions for when we finally got to meet each other was Barnes & Nobel and that sounded like the best thing ever.

There was never a thing about him that I didn’t like and it was part of why I was in a deep depression when he stopped all contact with me. It sucked. It sucked for a long time. I was surprised with how deeply it hurt me at times, but eventually I learned to be kind with myself over it. Because we knew each other a short time, but the love felt was deep and it was the foundation of something that could have potentially truly lasted. In my heart it has lasted without him in my life. It hurts less and less, but the love remains unchanged and I will never deny that.

But, I have truly accepted that he’s taken a different direction in his life. I’ve accepted that it’ll be up to him weather we ever talk again period. I try to think that one day we will at least talk again. That’s a door that will always be open to him should he want it. That truly loving someone means letting them be. So, for the foreseeable future this will be the last I talk about this on the blog. I don’t say forever because I honestly have no way of knowing that and maybe there might be something to be learned from all of it in the future. But, for now I’m just getting a lot of this off of my chest.

Saying all this allows me to reset and be grateful to someone who has had a major impact on my life and even if it was painful at the end it’s what I needed to learn my true strengths.

Since knowing him I have completely reworked my entire way of thinking in such a positive way. I am really kind to myself. I am so much more patient about life in general. The best way for me to accept things has been the mentality of what’s meant to be will be and that’s also helped me to be positive in knowing not only that if he has a role to play in my future he will be there, but also that if he doesn’t he won’t and that I will love again.

A lot of this might sound like I’m heavily romanticizing the connection we had and when we were in the thick of things we both romanticized the connection back then, because it was genuinely a great connection. That’s part of why it’s been so hard for me to let it be because #1 I don’t believe in pretending like I don’t love someone when I do and #2 My loyalty naturally is through the roof and #3 I believe in second chances and working things out instead of giving up. A big thing afterwards was me trying to figure out how to make things work. I talked with my mom, even convinced her to back down on certain things. I thought up a bunch of scenarios to try and think if I could do something to have things work and they just didn’t work.

After all that, I turned heavily inward. I psychoanalyzed the hell out of myself and decided that I was going to be happy no matter the circumstances. That’s a daunting task in general. Getting your depressed and anxious filled brain to cheer up and remain positive no matter what. But it worked. It’s working.

I’m human so I still get sad sometimes. I still get down on myself sometimes, but I am the sole person responsible for my own happiness. I’ve learned a lot about what hurts me. Especially when it comes to things that my family say to me in arguments. I’ve learned to let the full force of a majority of those things run off my mind like water. I’ve learned to recognize when I’m being negative towards myself and how to raise myself up instead and turn things around.

Even at work I’m so much better at not being anxious when things are busy. I’m so much more clearheaded and calm as an individual now. Partially, that’s thanks to the many times I’ve just lain on the floor of my bathroom meditating and talking to God and giving up all my worries to him. That’s been huge for me. Talking to God and saying this is how I’m feeling. This is what’s stressing me out right now can you please help me with it. Thank you for everything you’ve brought into my life and for how much better things have been recently.

It’s why I’ve gotten to a point where I’m very proud with myself. I’m steadily creating the life I want to live and choosing to be the best that I can be and yes the progress is slow, but I’m making it! I’ve been so much more at peace with being where I’m at and letting things move forward in a positive way. A lot of the people in my life that I had issues with are no longer in my life. A lot of new people have come in and became very good friends to me. I have a network of support and I am allowing the opportunities that are meant for me to come my way and to let be what isn’t meant for me.

I could choose to still be sad about my past and my current circumstances, but that’s not the story I want to tell for my life. I want to be a person that gets back up every time they are knocked down. Someone who holds no grudges and moves forward in peace no matter the situation. Someone who sees the light even if that light is temporarily dim.

No matter how low in life you get you can choose to climb mountains. You can let it consume you or you can get up as soon as your able. Rest too is often necessary and it’s not something that you should beat yourself up about.

There are no rules in life. Not really. You can believe whatever you want to believe. You can choose to change those beliefs whenever you want. You are not defined by who you were yesterday and if you want to change you can! Other people might see you as who you once were, but truly how other people see you doesn’t matter anyway. Following what makes you happy is the most important thing you could do for yourself. There is no reason at all to be miserable in life. We live too short of lives to remain in a labyrinth of misery.

Today and everyday I choose to start over in life whenever I need to. Starting over with new ideas and moving forward in a positive way in life in general.

I think that’s all I wanted to say for now.

Thanks you all for reading! Truly thank you all for being a part of my life. You’ve all made an impact on my life and I wouldn’t be here without all of you. I hope this post has helped any of you in some way.

-Till next time!

I Have a Plan

Some of you may have noticed that I’m actually posting pretty regularly. It’s been a really great thing for me and I’m happy to feel fully back in the groove of things.

But, it’s all part of a bigger plan. I’ve been working hard on figuring out a way for me to have a bunch of posts to go up on a schedule so that I can set aside larger chunks of time to write. I decided to do this because a lot of the posts I write on here actually take a quite a large chunk of my time and often require me to read something or watch something so that I can review it.

I tested this for a while over the past few weeks and so long as I dedicate a few days in succession to blogging I can free up over a week’s time to do other things. I started out slow and tried about two posts a day for a while, but due to my sister’s birthday and overall feeling a bit tired recently I’ve not really kept it up. But, for now, I’m going to be doing my best so that I can free up about a months time so I can actually sit down and write a book and not worry so much about the blog.

Scheduling and thinking ahead is so not my forte. I really like being spontaneous about what I write and when I write it, but I feel the need to take things one thing at a time and I don’t really want to take a whole month off from blogging to write… (even if that actually might make more sense).

I have no idea if this will actually work or not. But, I’m going to try. It’s an idea that make me way too overly busy, but we shall see.

Thanks for reading! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below.

Follow me on Instagram and Twitter!

Check out the Wolfe Creek Candle website!

-Till next time!

The Flow of Insight

When the sand falls away slipping through open fingers simply flip the scale and the sands start anew racing towards a destiny in the reverse direction.

Be like the child for the child doesn’t have care for what was or what is they take joy in their confusion and delight in each morsel of knowledge that comes their way.

Be like the mother who loves and does not count the child’s mishaps for in her eyes she sees only the love and in that purity nothing else matters.

Be like the air that flows and sustains life, it transforms endlessly and does not fear the change as it comes.

Be like the heart that loves without eyes for it knows the truth of where it’s home lies.

Do what you will in life, for life lives for itself and then it dies. No one knows the truth of death, but the truth of life is nothing and everything matters so be at peace and follow the call of your own beating pulse.

One sees the sun and one sees a star both are right. Peace is when they accept the understanding of another’s perception.

Trying to be perfect is like trying to alchemize gold from dirt, physically impossible and yet the magic of it calls the truest hearts. To let go of perfection is to free the spirt and only then will the best of you shine unencumbered.

The world stops turning for no one. It’s peaceful in its round face. Peace is being unaffected by chaos. Staying grounded in spite of the earths shakes.

Thanks for reading! This is a short bit of poetry. I was thinking of things that help me feel more at peace with myself and what is and this is what came out. Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below.

Follow me on Twitter and Instagram!

Check out the Wolfe Creek Candle website!

-Till next time!

Life is Beautiful

I’ve talked about my life a lot on the blog. I’ve talked about some of my deepest struggles and some of the lessons I’ve learned. I’ve talked about my relationship with mental illness and my bouts of depression and anxiety as well as feelings of things just going horribly and unchangeably wrong at various points of my life.

It took me many a break from blogging and from productivity in general to pull myself free from negative thinking and negative cycles. Because no after how many things go wrong in life its how you deal with it that matters and for a while I couldn’t see past my own pain and grief to see all the good that life has to offer.

Life is all about perspective. Sometimes there is value in letting yourself feel hurt, but becoming the hurt and the guilt doesn’t serve you or anyone else. One of the things I’ve worked deeply on in myself is not feeling like a victim. Letting go of the idea that anyone else’s actions have anything to do with me and accepting my situation for what it is so that i can make the best of it.

One thing I despise is pity or being in a state where everything feels like it sucks. I was once in a point of my life where that’s all I could see. The awful line up of events in my life that came up one after the other, but I’ve given up my power to them for way too long.

Life is beautiful. I am not defined by the things that caused me pain. Especially not the pain that was self-inflicted by my own mind. Which, truly was the biggest part of it. I am not someone who will ever choose to stay stuck. I might need to simmer in my sadness for a while, but I always come out of it. Without exception.

I am making my happiness my main priority. My marvel posts and posts like this one are a big part of that. I take care of myself with so much more care then I once did and I value myself so much more as well. For once in a very long time I feel whole.

You can choose to dance with the darkness in yourself or become one with it. I choose to dance with it. To understand it and to remind it of all the light the world has to offer. This world is so beautiful. Full of creatures that live their lives to the fullest. Full of nature and music. Full of reasons to laugh and be joyful. Full of reasons to dance.

That is what I am choosing to focus on. Enjoying friendships. Enjoying the ability to try new things. Enjoying a new found sense of peace. I get to create the story of what is to be my life and I want to make it a good one, not only that, but a happy one and that’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to make it so i go out of this life with a smile. Because life truly is beautiful and there is so much to be grateful for.

Thanks for reading! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below!

-Till next time!