My November Goals

So as many of you know, the past few months had been amazing for me. Some of the coolest most wonderful things came into my life. I was productive and having fun and enjoying life and what it had to offer. I felt amazing.

However, I haven’t posted in a few days. I hadn’t done so because well, some things threw my life into chaos and I had been forced to choose a path and even if I feel I choose the right one, my family isn’t happy about it. Yet either way, half of this decision isn’t mine to make and the person concerned in all of this is out of touch with me for a while.

In the meantime, I spent a lot of time thinking. A lot of time trying to figure out some things. Spent time watching many YouTube videos so that I could have some happiness. Some sense of normalcy. I feel like my life has turned into a battlefield and I for a short time felt like I was loosing. I felt I was in a lot of turmoil and I needed that time to figure some things out on my own.

What this all has to do with November is that I’m going to get back to myself this month. I’m going to be productive. I’m going to continue my life. I’m going to be as happy as I can, because I know that’s what the person/people I love most would want for me. What I would want for all the people I love. I need to finish some things I started last month. So there’s still going to be some spooky talk for a while. I’m going to read some great books. I’m going to write and I’m going to write as much as I can. I’m going to put myself first and do the best I can in all ways that I can.

When I think about the difference between what’s happened these past few months and what’s going on right now it’s staggering. However, I’m hoping that things will turn out well soon. I’m hoping that whatever happens I can come out of all of this in tact. I believe I will. I believe that I’ve chosen well. Sometimes, you have to take some time and choose for yourself. Sometimes you have to fight for what you believe in.

Thanks for reading! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below!

-Till next time!

Passage 

Tiptoe across creaking stepping stones 

Quiet is a privilege for the wicked 

Taking the hidden route between empty walls

To meet the one with the ticket 

Gone with no light to brighten the path

Nothing to help the young flee 

To see the love the other half 

Of a woman who had never been free

What gossip would ensue if others knew 

Of the two lovers little rendezvous 

Gone would be their hideaway

But no pensive worry would come to pass

When all that matters is a love that would last 

In a time of medieval gain
Thank you all for reading! Let me know you thoughts in the comments.

-Till next time! 

Delirious Thought


Swirling, Swirling, Delirously, my minds a mess a twisting, fogging, whirling thing 

My eyes awake is a dizzying weakness, I don’t know how to feel right again

It’s weird what a nap can cause, dehydration mixed with empty tiredness without cause 

A mind that doesn’t wish to wake in a place between the conscious world

Split thought, distraction, fragmented dreams, wondering at reality

Not at peace or feeling anything, just their mind not quite present in the body

The thirst lingers yet the body feels full just a drop or two more, nothings clears 

The eyes are the worst half-closed wishing to go back to lost memory of dreams 

Lacking the full ability to see, even if the images are clear the perception leans 

Out of body, it is like a high, but no drug induces this feeling, just a tired hour sleep

Why must I wake to twisted feeling? 

Arms tired, a slight draping pain, the haze surrounds in a cocoon 

When will I find myself truly awake?

Thank you for reading this strange haze of a poem. This is 100% how I feel right now. I took a nap and feel delirious from need for water, water that hasn’t helped as much I wished. If this poems says anything to you let me know. I always wonder at this weird state of mind I get to sometimes after I will take a nap from fatigue. 

I hope you enjoyed.

-Till next time!